I really wanna have a Bob in my blob. Does anyone out there want to be Bob? Anyone who might be mentioned in my blog in the near future who doesn't already have a nickname? Maybe?
Bob.
Thursday, August 05, 2004
Wednesday, August 04, 2004
Love Love Love
Happy Anniversary Muffy & Steph!
Everyone, the second anniversary is apparently cotton (traditional) or china (modern). Let's see what we can do with that.
Everyone, the second anniversary is apparently cotton (traditional) or china (modern). Let's see what we can do with that.
Tuesday, August 03, 2004
Airline
Do y'all ever watch Airline? This show kills me. It's all basically the same stories. People miss flights, people are too drunk to fly, occasionally celebrities pop up and luggage often gets lost. And SouthWest employees occasionally partay partay. Sometimes there are other stories, but these are the main ones. And I can't stop watching (Mom, this is your fault). People's sense of entitlement just kills me. Just kills me. KILLS ME. Ahem.
People get smashed and then don't understand why they can't get on a plane with lots of other people in a very little space. And when they're told they need to sober up before they can fly they go into the bar. Because that's an AWESOME place to sober up. Why do you need to be drunk on a plane anyway? I can sort of see it when it's a Bachelorette Party going to Vegas or something like that. But people just flying alone, getting smashed in the bar, early in the morning.
And I love the folks who miss the plane. Do these people ever leave their home? Lots of times people don't understand why a plane didn't wait until they arrived. Like the gate agents were just supposed to hang out knowing in their hearts that this passenger will arrive. If a plane waits for someone who might be getting on then everyone on the plane will be a little late to their destination, maybe missing their connecting flights. The plane will probably then be late taking off again and going to it's next destination, screwing up a whole long line of trips that this particular plane needs to be taking. It's not like the plane flies from Cleveland to LA and then hangs out for a while resting and all that. It's not a flight crew that needs a pit stop between trips. It's a freakin' plane. Unload it, clean it, fill it up, load it up and send that puppy back out! Also, the jackasses who feel the plane should've waited until they moseyed on up? Let's take a moment to picture how they would react if they were ON a plane that was waiting for a lazy late motherfucker. Yeah. Not pretty.
Once, I was flying to or from college and was stuck in LA. Flying standby at busy times often got me stuck in LA. Or wherever. Well, they boarded the plane, made announcements, made a final boarding annoucement, did a seat count, gave away the empty seats to standby passengers and pulled up the jetway, about five minutes or so before the flight's schedule departure time. Some guy and his family came strolling up to the gate and said that was their flight. The gate agent (politely) said the flight was pretty much gone. (Now, on the show, this is the point where the asshole points at the plane out there and insists it be brought back to the gate, opened up, jetway rolled back out and their asses allowed on - making the flight LATE.) The gate agent was really nice at first and seemed concerned that this family missed the flight. He started trying to get them on another flight, trying somehow to get them to their destination at this point. He was dealing with the situation as it was because that plane wasn't coming back. He also seemed concerned that they missed the flight, trying to find out if they were held up at the ticket counter or security. This was a million years ago before you had to show up three hours early just to make it through security (well, that's how it is in New York now at least). The guy started blustering and trying to blame the gate agent and everyone else in the world saying that he got there BEFORE the departure time. The gate agent pointed out that when tickets are purchased (and on the tickets and everywhere else) customers are told they need to be in the gate area 10 minutes prior to departure time. And he was still trying to figure out why this guy was late since he checked in with plenty of time to get to the gate. Finally the guy just says they were wondering around and he didn't have a watch and wasn't paying attention to the time. Though he might've said it in a much more roundabout way. The gate agent still tried to help the guy get on the next flight and and all but wasn't as interested in pacifing the man's bad attitude at that point. And then the man just went nuts. He started yelling and throwing his giant (too big for a carry-on, really sir) bag around. Then gate agent started threatening to call security. It was an amazing spectacle. And I still don't understand that mindset. Really. You fucked up. You were late. Your flight left. Get on the next one. Yeah, it's a few hours later, but deal.
When I heading to Hawai'i from LA one time, around Christmas, I was checking when (like 3 hours early) and a woman came up to check in for a flight that was due to leave in half an hour. Have you seen the security line at LAX? It made me almost cry. It is a horrible, horrible thing. No way was this girl getting through security in even 45 minutes, let alone 20. Anyway, the ticket agent nicely and matter-of-factly told the girl she had missed her flight for all intents and purposes. Even though it was half an hour before departure time. The girl said she knew and was just running late and wanted to see about getting out as soon after as she could. And I almost wanted to run over and kiss her. She was my superhero for the day. And really, she shouldn't be my superhero because that's how people should act.
Ooooh, and the people who get mad when they are on overbooked flights. As we have all seen (haven't we?), not everyone gets on every flight they're booked for. People miss flights, they change their mind at the last minute, things come up, they get an earlier flight, whatever. If an airline only books as many people as they have seats, they're going to lose serious money. Unless they charge you for the seat as soon as you book it, whether you end up in it or not. No refunds, no changing flights, nada. But can you imagine how Jane Entitlement would feel about that? Let's take another moment, shall we? Yes. Anyway, airlines overbook flights to a certain percentage knowing they'll get no-shows. Often this works fine. Other times too many people actually show up. So those of you who wisely showed up & checked in early get on the flight. Those of you without watches, hanging out in the bars, might not. The airline tries to get people to take a later flight offering upgrades, coupons and sometimes hotel stays. And if people take it, the watch-free drunkards (sorry, cranky at these people right now) get on the flight. If not, well, they get put on other flights and life goes on. There's only so much an airline can do. Well, on the show these folks go crazy as if this is an unheard practice. That they've never seen or heard of such a thing. This revelation usually comes after they announce what frequent flyers they are (My Ass!). A few times on the show I've seen people threaten legal action because a flight was overbooked. Hee. Just kills me. Show up to the airport at least an hour or two ahead (depending upon the airport). Reconfirm your flights. Don't get smashed beyond reason a half hour before you flight. All of these things will lead you to a better flying experience. Unless you're me, in which case you'll be on a delayed flight to hell with 17 screaming children. But I'm special.
Anyway, these people piss me off and I'm going to start hiding smelly things in their bags when I see them in airports now. Grrrrr... And don't even get me started on the luggage losing people. Ugh.
But I can't stop watching. Damn you, Mom. Making me watch the people and get all angry.
People get smashed and then don't understand why they can't get on a plane with lots of other people in a very little space. And when they're told they need to sober up before they can fly they go into the bar. Because that's an AWESOME place to sober up. Why do you need to be drunk on a plane anyway? I can sort of see it when it's a Bachelorette Party going to Vegas or something like that. But people just flying alone, getting smashed in the bar, early in the morning.
And I love the folks who miss the plane. Do these people ever leave their home? Lots of times people don't understand why a plane didn't wait until they arrived. Like the gate agents were just supposed to hang out knowing in their hearts that this passenger will arrive. If a plane waits for someone who might be getting on then everyone on the plane will be a little late to their destination, maybe missing their connecting flights. The plane will probably then be late taking off again and going to it's next destination, screwing up a whole long line of trips that this particular plane needs to be taking. It's not like the plane flies from Cleveland to LA and then hangs out for a while resting and all that. It's not a flight crew that needs a pit stop between trips. It's a freakin' plane. Unload it, clean it, fill it up, load it up and send that puppy back out! Also, the jackasses who feel the plane should've waited until they moseyed on up? Let's take a moment to picture how they would react if they were ON a plane that was waiting for a lazy late motherfucker. Yeah. Not pretty.
Once, I was flying to or from college and was stuck in LA. Flying standby at busy times often got me stuck in LA. Or wherever. Well, they boarded the plane, made announcements, made a final boarding annoucement, did a seat count, gave away the empty seats to standby passengers and pulled up the jetway, about five minutes or so before the flight's schedule departure time. Some guy and his family came strolling up to the gate and said that was their flight. The gate agent (politely) said the flight was pretty much gone. (Now, on the show, this is the point where the asshole points at the plane out there and insists it be brought back to the gate, opened up, jetway rolled back out and their asses allowed on - making the flight LATE.) The gate agent was really nice at first and seemed concerned that this family missed the flight. He started trying to get them on another flight, trying somehow to get them to their destination at this point. He was dealing with the situation as it was because that plane wasn't coming back. He also seemed concerned that they missed the flight, trying to find out if they were held up at the ticket counter or security. This was a million years ago before you had to show up three hours early just to make it through security (well, that's how it is in New York now at least). The guy started blustering and trying to blame the gate agent and everyone else in the world saying that he got there BEFORE the departure time. The gate agent pointed out that when tickets are purchased (and on the tickets and everywhere else) customers are told they need to be in the gate area 10 minutes prior to departure time. And he was still trying to figure out why this guy was late since he checked in with plenty of time to get to the gate. Finally the guy just says they were wondering around and he didn't have a watch and wasn't paying attention to the time. Though he might've said it in a much more roundabout way. The gate agent still tried to help the guy get on the next flight and and all but wasn't as interested in pacifing the man's bad attitude at that point. And then the man just went nuts. He started yelling and throwing his giant (too big for a carry-on, really sir) bag around. Then gate agent started threatening to call security. It was an amazing spectacle. And I still don't understand that mindset. Really. You fucked up. You were late. Your flight left. Get on the next one. Yeah, it's a few hours later, but deal.
When I heading to Hawai'i from LA one time, around Christmas, I was checking when (like 3 hours early) and a woman came up to check in for a flight that was due to leave in half an hour. Have you seen the security line at LAX? It made me almost cry. It is a horrible, horrible thing. No way was this girl getting through security in even 45 minutes, let alone 20. Anyway, the ticket agent nicely and matter-of-factly told the girl she had missed her flight for all intents and purposes. Even though it was half an hour before departure time. The girl said she knew and was just running late and wanted to see about getting out as soon after as she could. And I almost wanted to run over and kiss her. She was my superhero for the day. And really, she shouldn't be my superhero because that's how people should act.
Ooooh, and the people who get mad when they are on overbooked flights. As we have all seen (haven't we?), not everyone gets on every flight they're booked for. People miss flights, they change their mind at the last minute, things come up, they get an earlier flight, whatever. If an airline only books as many people as they have seats, they're going to lose serious money. Unless they charge you for the seat as soon as you book it, whether you end up in it or not. No refunds, no changing flights, nada. But can you imagine how Jane Entitlement would feel about that? Let's take another moment, shall we? Yes. Anyway, airlines overbook flights to a certain percentage knowing they'll get no-shows. Often this works fine. Other times too many people actually show up. So those of you who wisely showed up & checked in early get on the flight. Those of you without watches, hanging out in the bars, might not. The airline tries to get people to take a later flight offering upgrades, coupons and sometimes hotel stays. And if people take it, the watch-free drunkards (sorry, cranky at these people right now) get on the flight. If not, well, they get put on other flights and life goes on. There's only so much an airline can do. Well, on the show these folks go crazy as if this is an unheard practice. That they've never seen or heard of such a thing. This revelation usually comes after they announce what frequent flyers they are (My Ass!). A few times on the show I've seen people threaten legal action because a flight was overbooked. Hee. Just kills me. Show up to the airport at least an hour or two ahead (depending upon the airport). Reconfirm your flights. Don't get smashed beyond reason a half hour before you flight. All of these things will lead you to a better flying experience. Unless you're me, in which case you'll be on a delayed flight to hell with 17 screaming children. But I'm special.
Anyway, these people piss me off and I'm going to start hiding smelly things in their bags when I see them in airports now. Grrrrr... And don't even get me started on the luggage losing people. Ugh.
But I can't stop watching. Damn you, Mom. Making me watch the people and get all angry.
Corporate Threat
Dude. They're putting x-ray machines in our lobby. Well, last time I was down there they'd put one in. By one of our entrances. They weren't using it or anything, but it was there and they were testing it. It's creepy. I don't want to have to run my bag through an x-ray machine every day. They can't really expect that can they? Maybe it's for non-employees only? I don't know. This is all so weird. I hate working for a big financial company right now. It's scaring me a little and I hate that. It kinda makes me want to move to Indiana and see if I can get back my grandpa's store, or move to Hawai'i and work in a surf shop. I don't want an x-ray machine or two or seven in my office building's lobby.
This amuses me though. I like the little elephant icon. So cute. The convention will be interesting if nothing else. I'm debating taking a day off work to protest. I also kinda just want to work from home and avoid it all. I don't know though. Maybe a little of both. I still can't believe they thought having the RNC here in NYC was a good idea.
This amuses me though. I like the little elephant icon. So cute. The convention will be interesting if nothing else. I'm debating taking a day off work to protest. I also kinda just want to work from home and avoid it all. I don't know though. Maybe a little of both. I still can't believe they thought having the RNC here in NYC was a good idea.
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