Grrls Rock

Vader and Muffy are the coolest chicas on the planet and I adore them. They helped me get rid of the body, yo! Oops, did I just break the blood oath? Um... it wasn't a body, really, it was, um, a futon. Yes. A futon.

See, Muffy and Vader came over last night. First Muffy took charge and was all super garden gal and we planted my three azalea bushes. Apparently I have worms and great soil so that rocks. But there are weeds and grubs and that doesn't rock. But the bushes are now planted and I watered them this morning and we're keeping our fingers crossed. If they work out I'm going to trick Muffy into coming over lots to garden with me until I think I can do it on my own. There might be flower beds soon. Maybe an herb garden as I love fresh rosemary, basil and dill. But we'll see. Let's make certain I don't kill the azaleas first. And of course room needs to be left for the hammock and the flamingo.

After that we suited up to get rid of the 'futon'. Yes, the 'futon'. When I moved into this apartment Mom came and helped and was awesome. And then Dad joined us for the unpacking and the settling in. They were amazing. We even got a U-Haul and headed off to Ikea. Where I got a sofa bed that I liked. So the 'futon' became unnecessary. Rather than kicking it to the curb at that time, Mom thought we could put it out back and make it weather proof. Well, before we could figure out how to do that, the first rains came. And then the snow. So, a year and a half of weather turned the 'futon' into a horrible, horrible thing. And with the big backyard party coming up, it had to be gotten rid of. Taken care of. Taken out. Um, to the curb.

I didn't even realize how gross it had gotten. It was waterlogged and had at least two snails and two slugs on it as well as spiders and things. And did I mention that plant life was GROWING out of it? Yeah. Ew.

So, we tossed on some garbage bag dresses and went to work (the photos are EXCELLENT). Muffy was brilliant and came up with the idea of tying rope around the 'futon' mattress to keep it folded and give it handles. And to keep anything, um, inside it from falling out. And so we lugged that puppy through my apartment and out to the curb. Where I almost threw up at the grossness. We got the grossness all over our legs and shoes and ew. Ew. Ew. Then we had to lug out the lighter, but just as hard to maneuver, frame. Which we did. While injuring Vader's hand badly. Then we washed up a little, Bactined and iced Vader's hand and I moped up the slime trail from the futon. Then we discussed possibility of The Thunder From Down Under in Atlantic City before Vader had to flee and take care of Taylor's dog. So Muffy and I had a beer before she took her smelly slime-covered self back home to her honey.

Now I owe them my first born or something. But until then, I just want everyone to know that they are the best women I know. Yay!

The 'futon' was still out there when I left so I'm not certain it's gone from my life, but let's hope the sanitation guys took care of it for me. Otherwise Vader's injury and all my aches and bruises might've been for naught. Class is going to HURT today. Dammit. I'll be lucky if I can do one push up with the way my arms feel right now. I may try and go early to stretch a lot if I can.