Friday, December 03, 2004

I'm Okay. Really

People are very sweet. The seven or so of you who read this and worry. I'm not losing my mind or anything. I'm just a little frustrated and overwhelmed. But I'll be okay. The emails and kind words were very sweet and greatly appreciated though.

This blogging thing is kind of weird to me in it's one-sidedness. People read this and know what I've done during the week or what mood I'm in or what random thoughts are going through my head. And they'll refer to it or send me a sweet email or taunt me about the Red Sox or something. But it's not knowledge they gained from a conversation so I don't necessarily know how their week is going or what they're up to or thinking about or feeling. And I feel horribly self-absorbed and selfish then. Because I am a dork. It just kind of throws me. I'm used to being observant and while I babble a lot I don't really talk about meaningful things or useful things about me. I don't think. So I'm used to knowing lots about OTHER people and feeling a little like people don't know about me. But here, I go on and on and on and on and on and on about me. And people read it. And then things seem reversed. Which is kind of the point. I started this as a writing exercise and a way for me to be a little bit more open about myself. Because I feel like I close myself off to most people who aren't my parents. And I don't know how healthy that is. Plus, I am rather in love with myself so the hearty dose of narcissism involved in personal blogging (and blogging in general, really) makes me happy.

Anyway, just wanted to let you all know that I'm stressed and busy and a little frustrated, but doing okay and managing to get things done (if not ALL things done) and having a good time as well. Thank you very much for your concern.

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