Thursday, February 19th
I left work early and got to the airport with a minimum of fuss. Had a root beer float in the airport and booked it to my gate. I got on the plane and got my little window seat. Sleeping wasn't really an option. We had a full flight and a whole group on the plane with us. A very loud, chatty group. And a crazy lady sitting next to me. She unpacked her HUGE bag about seven times. And had an obscene amount of pills of some sort. And she also seemed to be pretending that the seat next to her (MINE) was empty and kept banging into me and putting her stuff in front of my seat and all that. So annoying. They showed Le Divorce (Kate Hudson annoys me) and Solaris on the plane. Loved having my iPod and ignoring the world around me.
Landed a little early, grabbed my bags and hopped on a shuttle to the hotel. Pumpkin and crew had gone to see the 10:30PM Zumanity so I checked in (not too long of a line) and got my key and headed up to the room. It was a huge room. Two Queen beds, a jacuzzi in the slanty corner (we were in the pyramid with the slanty outer walls) with a lovely view of the strip, a sitting room with a giant purple couch, two tvs, a mini fridge and all sorts of space. So I unpacked and showered and got in my PJs and was all comfy and happy. Then Pumpkin called post show, so she, Liz and Doe came upstairs while I got dressed and we all went out for a drink as it was Liz's birthday. Not too exciting but one should start Vegas with a drink rather than just bed, I think. Anyway, then I got to get to bed.
Friday, February 20th
I got up about 10:15 and Liz was packing, Pumpkin was in the shower and Doe had wandered off. Apparently everyone slept in the other room because I was snoring. I hear I finally stopped at some point and then Pumpkin started. I felt bad, but didn't know what else to do. I only snore when congested and the plane air does me no favors. Ah well. Turns out Doe had gone out and returned her rental car (which she rented to hold her luggage while Pumpkin and Liz were at the conference I guess) and had breakfast so she showered and all while Liz, Pumpkin and I had the Breakfast Buffet at the Luxor. They were starting into lunch but still had the breakfast stuff set up. Excellent scrambled eggs but bad cheese blintzes. Excellent Apple crepes though. You all need to know these details. Really. Then we waited with Liz for her shuttle to the airport.
Then the three of us decided to wander. I'm feeling kinda fuzzy about stuff on Friday right now. I know we got our first foofy drink, a dragon full of Pina Colada at the Excalibur. And we headed through various casinos, walking along the strip, people watching and popping by places. We caught a fountain show at the Bellagio because Pumpkin likes them more than anything else in Vegas (even more than my BOYFRIEND). We kept calling Turnip for status reports and finally got her on her way in the early afternoon. Though that's when the rain started so she had a bitch of a time getting to Vegas. Oh, right. We headed down the strip to the Mirage because Pumpkin wanted to see the Tigers and Dolphins in Siegfried and Roy's Secret Garden - not as dirty as it sounds - and the Tigers close at 3:30. So we booked down there and saw them. Pretty orange tigers, white tigers, a cheetah, a black panther, an elephant (with turkey) and a couple of lions. We watched them and took tons of pictures. Then caught some of the dolphins. We saw some dolphin ‘training sessions’ (not shows, they don’t do shows, no no no) and also got to see them through the windows in the lower viewing area. You can see into the tanks and watch them swimming underwater so that was kinda neat. And there was shopping because heaven forbid Pumpkin and I not have tiger and dolphin jewelry. And of course I got sunglasses. Special zebra striped Siegfried and Roy sunglasses. Oh yeah, baby.
Then we headed to the Paris hotel for Eiffel Towers of Strawberry Daiquiris and crepes. Pumpkin had Raspberry & Cream and I had pure Chocolate. Doe snacked from each. Awesome. We also planned for Turnip's arrival. Then we popped across the street for ANOTHER Bellagio Fountain show in the rain. We walked the length of the lagoon and Pumpkin wanted to watch the next show. Doe wasn't going to stand for that so she headed back to the Luxor on the bus. Turnip was about on the strip by then so she picked us up (after we got some decongestant and ear plugs at CVS - I felt bad about the snoring last night) and saved us a good long walk in the rain. We got dried off and headed to Gonzalez y Gonzalez in New York, New York. Turnip got a horrible drink called a Woo Woo that she remembered liking but then remembered that she had already been hammered the last time she had one and liked it... Pumpkin and I enjoyed our awesome raspberry drinks. I think I ate enchiladas. Don't remember. Food so wasn't important. Then came the quest for Turnip's building drink. We searched all over for the Empire State Building asking all sorts of people and even meeting a security guard (older guy, not hottie in a uniform) from Honolulu. But alas, no Empire State Building. So we got her a Statue of Liberty. She asked for a Pina Colada but was given a Chi Chi. She drank it anyway. Heh. I think we helped. Heh. Then we went back to the room and jacuzzied with glittery bath bombs and the Statue of Liberty. Then Turnip rubbed my feet because she is awesome. Then she decided I was bad at foot rubs and we should get massages. So we got appointments for 2 for 1AM and 1 at 1:30AM and went and showered (in the many different smelling showers) and sat in the whirlpool and drank a ton of water and got massages. It was awesome. Then we went back to the room. I would like to mention that while I had clothing over my swimsuit, Pumpkin and Turnip walked through the casino in t-shirts with towels around their waists. They made quite a sight. On the way back from the spa we stopped and got me a frequent player The One Club Card and I won a free hat. Woo. Wildly exciting. Then I showered and we all sacked out. Apparently I snored briefly right in Turnip's ear, but I think it was short lived.
Saturday, February 21st
We got up around 10ish. I think. Maybe. We then got ready and went to the cheap ticket places to see if we could get half price Thunder from Down Under tickets. Alas, we could not. We did see half price Star Trek the Experience tickets, but did not purchase them. I was denied Star Trek the Experience for Vegas 2004 so it’s going on the MUST list for 2005. I don’t care what Pumpkin says. Doe got tired of walking and decided that she was going to watch the M&M Movie at the M&M store and would catch a cab to the Bellagio and meet us there for brunch. So we walked to the Bellagio and caught ANOTHER fountain show. Then we went in the Bellagio and saw the pretty glass flower ceiling and DISCO PONY! I want a DISCO PONY! Then we wandered through the garden there - all decked out for Chinese New Year. We waited in line for the Bellagio Cafe and were eventually joined by Doe. We got in and had a lovely breakfast. Coffee and eggs benedict with tomato instead of ham. We played Keno but only Doe won, $260. Then we went out and caught another fountain show.
Then we took to the bus to the Stratosphere. Doe said there was a fun show with Showgirls and magic and an Elvis Impersonator. Um, no. The showgirls were fake and had tops on and couldn't dance, the Elvis impersonator was a dog (a cute dog, but a dog nonetheless), the magic was tiny and the comedians were awful and the singer wasn’t much. It made us sad. And it made us drink stratospheres of booze. Turnip and I sucked ours down quickly to help ease the pain. At least the dog and the bird were entertaining. Do NOT go see Viva Las Vegas at the Stratosphere. Then there was shopping. Then it was too late to see the view from the Stratosphere in the daylight (being as it had gotten dark) so we bussed back up to our end of the strip. Ooooh, and we kept seeing scary cheerleaders from the competition that was in town. There were actually lots of creepy people on the bus. Big fun for everyone. The creepy people kept talking to me too. So strange. Lots of locals giving advice and chatting and things. I need to stop with the eye contact thing. I’m too approachable. And yet also scary according to some people. Whatever, back to Vegas.
Then we went to the Excalibur and got our nudie show tickets. And Turnip purchased a dragon o' booze while I bought a tiara. Woo. My One Club Card got me 10% off too. Woo again. DISCOUNT Tiara, almost as cool as DISCO PONY. Then we went back to the room. Pumpkin fled for some alone time. Doe ran off to play Keno. Turnip and I did the only sensible thing and went to the spa for smelly showers and whirlpool time. The only problem with the whirlpool and Turnip is that she likes to throw ice at me while I'm in the whirlpool. Because she is mean. Then we got pretty, met back in the room and headed out.
We had so-so Pan Asian food and a HORRIBLE waitress at Chin Chin Cafe in New York New York. She didn't want to wait on us. She lied to Turnip about the size of her soup and she gave us the check when we wanted dessert. We hate her. We hate her a lot.
Then we went and stood in line for the boys. We got there late as we foolishly thought we didn't want to be up front. We were mistaken. Pumpkin was NOT excited by the idea of the boys and kept saying that if they were not attractive she was holding ME responsible. Ha! The Thunder from Down Under was awesome. The boys were hot, the costumes were hysterical and the other girls there were totally mock worthy. I even saw Pumpkin clapping with the rest of us and seeming to mean it. The highlights were my boyfriend and all the Aerosmith and the older woman with the gray hair getting a handful of the Thunder from the MC. It was hot. We're going back next year. We are so going back next year. Hee hee hee.
Then we headed to RA the nightclub in our hotel. It was SO BAD. The music was okay but they had these awful sirens. The boys outnumbered the girls 3-1 and yet we could NOT find a single attractive guy in the bunch. It was smoky from the fog machine and lots of creepy guys were circling us. And the creepy couples dancing and mounting each other, ew. And the guy in the white pimp suit and hat doing a dance where he keeps slapping his partner’s ass, ew. Pumpkin left first because the fog was bothering her contacts. I fled next as I just couldn't handle the creepy with my mad fatigue. Then Turnip and Doe followed not too much later, chased away by the bad, scary hip-hop DJ. “Get your fucking hands up in the air, people.” Then I showered and called my Mom (unfortunately NOT a drunk dial - sorry Mom) and we passed out.
Sunday, February 21st
We got up about 10 to pack and get out of the room. We checked out about 11 and then tossed our stuff in Turnip's car. The line to leave it with the bell hop was about a mile long and Turnip had her car so it seemed like the right choice.
Then we headed to the MANDAlay Bay to have their Champagne Brunch. It was lovely. Then we wandered back to the Luxor and shopped a bit, at which point we realized Turnip was missing her wallet. Alas. Two and a half mimosas apparently do that to a gal. So we booked all the way back to the buffet and luckily it had been turned in. So she got it from the security desk and NOTHING was missing. Hooray. Of course we then realized she'd left her umbrella in the store at the Luxor. Alas. Two and a half mimosas apparently do that to a gal.
Then we cabbed it to the Paris so Turnip could get an Eiffel Tower of booze before we cut her off at 4PM. She got one of those, and Pumpkin and I split one (with extra banana because we’re so cute), and then we headed back to the Bellagio for, you guessed it, the fountain show. It was the Proud to be an American Song. Turnip and I sang and danced before, after, and during. Because we can.
Then we went to the Monte Carlo for the start of the great Elvis slot machine search. We started with the Monte Carlo because it was the nearest casino that took my One Club Card. Dorks we are. They had NONE. So we tried all over the place. We went to Excalibur and they had apparently taken them all out not long ago. Bad, bad Excalibur. So I played some other slots for a bit while Turnip and Pumpkin sucked back some towers. We finally found Elvis slots in New York, New York and I blissed out for a while. They wanted to nap but I pouted a bit and said I wasn't spending my last couple of hours in Vegas sitting on a couch in a lounge. Heh. We had to get Turnip some aspirin and finally found the Vegas 2004 shirts Pumpkin had been looking for all weekend. We now have matching shirts and are the dorkiest hot chicks in all the land.
So then we wandered down to the Bellagio and, oddly enough, saw a Fountain Show. Sadly it was the same Celine Dion "My Heart will Vomit" one we saw earlier in the day. The water was pretty but the song, not so much. Then it was off to pit stop (the buildings make you pee, how unexpected) and shoe shop at the Bellagio. And then wandering the Forum Shops at Caesar's Palace. We bought Aerosmith CDs to remind us of the half naked hotness and then cabbed it back to the Luxor to unload Doe (who was taking a later flight), get the umbrella and get ourselves off to the airport.
Checking in was easy and yet painful as we were told our flights would be at least 2 hours late as EVERYTHING was running late, due to the torrential rains and flooding in the desert. Bah. Pumpkin and I opted to hang out in the middle of the airport for a while. We saw a tex mex restaurant and Pumpkin said we needed Margaritas. We waited in line there and finally got beer and a margarita and a chance to sit. Service was slow as they were slammed with customers but that was fine with us. We called Doe to tell her to call the airline as her flight was undoubtedly delayed. Then we saw her flight was canceled and called to tell her that. Hopefully she found a place to stay and made it home yesterday. The poor waitresses were having a rough time of it at the bad tex-mex place yet were polite and nice and doing the best they could. Yet the assholes on either side of use chose to 1) tip only a dollar on what I’m sure was at least a $20 bill and 2) tip about $1.50 completely in CHANGE for what I’m sure was at least a $35 bill. Pumpkin and I were disgusted. Then we hung out like slugs on the floor with everyone else for a while. Then off to our gates as Pumpkin though she might leave at 11:45 (I was slated for a 1:15AM Departure at this point). Security was packed but moving briskly. Pumpkin's flight kept getting bumped back too and I think we both got off around 1:30 or so. Ugh. We kept talking on our cells to each other and to Turnip to keep her awake on the drive home. Finally I got on my flight and passed into a coma. Bliss.
And that was Vegas 2004. I think.
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